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Thursday
Jun142012

It’s my duty

So very many people I love have come down with a case of the babies!  Is the world’s population doubling every 20 minutes?  I assume yes.  (There also seems to be a mild divorce-o-virus going around.  Everyone go wash your hands.  Don’t touch your face.) 

For not-a-mommy blog, and for not-a-mommy, I sure do spend a lot of time writing about diapers.  For example, right now.  Personally, I think diapers make a fantastic shower gift or baby present—especially if said diapers have benefits beyond just keeping poop off the floor.  Want to learn about such diapers?  Hooray!

Gdiapers!Hey, remember when my nephew was hatching, and I was excited about gdiapers?  They’re (theoretically) flushable, compostable, or throw-out-able, v. eco-friendly, plus also supercute.  Well, now my sister’s having a girl in, like, 20 minutes, who’ll get to wear the ruffle-butted gdiaper, so I’m still excited!  Based on an extremely scientific field survey (of my sister and brother in law, who have been diapering my nephew for his entire life (p.s. he’s two)), gdiapers are fantastic in theory and pretty good in execution, though disposables still win for convenience and fewer blowouts.  One big gdiaper plus is how much diaper rash Nephew DIDN’T have with them.  Read alllllllll about them at gdiaper’s sweet-ass (heh) site!  RUFFLEBUTT!

If you’re leaning more disposable-y, check out The Honest Company.  Honest diapers!Founded in part by Jessica Alba (because: sure), they’re nontoxic diapers (and wipes and household products and sunscreen) that come in supercute prints (like stars, or skulls-and-crossbones) or formalwear white.  They ALSO make the world awesomer by partnering with baby-centric charities, contributing money, time and products to families who otherwise don’t have a lot of those things.  Hooray for everything!

Oh Crap! Potty Training!Eventually, though, everyone quits wearing diapers (for some decades, anyway).  I’ve never potty trained anyone (including, arguably, myself), but in case I ever have to, I feel like I’m prepared, having found Jamie Glowacki’s Oh Crap! Potty Training.  Jamie is a mom and a toddler whisperer, as well as hilarious and generous and kind.  (She’s also for realsies circus people, which (together with the rest of it) automatically qualifies her to be Imaginary Girl Gang’s Grand High Vizier, or…something.)  Delicious sprinkler nephew!How much do 2-3 years’ worth of diapers cost?  I don’t have a clue, but Jamie’s potty training book is $37, which seems like such a bargain I just want to mail her all the cash I have on me.  (J/k, I PayPal-d an e-reader copy of her book and emailed it to my brother in law.)  Hey, do you want a copy of Oh Crap! Potty Training?  For yourself, or for your brother in law?  Leave us a comment; tell us a potty story!  We’ll pick a rando winner!

If you’re reading this, I’m guessing no one gave you any kind of kudos today for going in the potty like a big kid.  I’d like to give you a big high five, right after we both wash our hands.  EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!

Thursday
Jun072012

Crafty bivalves, ballsy girls + snack break

Adrian and our friends, the oysters!Has today been a joke-day for anyone else?  Besides generally thinking today was Friday, at one point this afternoon I thought to myself, “Well, at least it’s after 4:00,” and glanced at the clock, where for some reason it was 2:25.  TODAY IS *THAT* DAY.  This is going to be short, so I can go bang my face on my desk.

Not long after you and I hung out last time, Adrian and I drove on over to Tybee Island!  Where we drove past TURTLE CROSSING signs!  Which made me think, simultaneously, “Awesome!” and also, “OH DEAR GOD, PLEASE DO NOT CROSS NOW, LITTLE TURTLES!”  Fortuitously, none did.  Anyway, we had A hostess gift from an oyster!dinner at the Crab Shack, which was silly and fun, and right at the very end of our platter of oysters, one of them gave me a pearl!  In my mouth.  And I did NOT break a tooth or swallow it!  THANK you, little oyster!  I will take good care of your gift!  (P.S. You were delicious; thx!)

While we’re all feeling all “Well, wouldja lookit that!,” let’s look at this pretty sweet soon-to-be kids book about Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley and Ada Lovelace!  Lookit how much Kickstarter money these cats got!  From Wollstonecraft’s Kickstarter page (emphasis theirs):  “This is the made up story about two very real girlsAda, the world's first From Wollstonecraft's Kickstarter page! Srsly, how beautiful?? So beautiful!computer programmer, and Mary, the world's first science fiction author – caught up in a steampunk world of hot-air balloons and steam engines, jewel thieves and mechanical contraptions.  For readers 8-12.  This is a pro-math, pro-science, pro-history and pro-literature adventure novel for and about girls.  If Jane Austen wrote about zeppelins and brass goggles, this would be the book.”  I mean, I think we can all agree Wollstonecraft sounds pretty great.

Finally, hey, who’s hungry?  Today’s SnackMaster is Kathleen, who is a vegetarian married to a vegan, so everybody’s snacking today!  (AND there’s no gluten!)  Kathleen gives us a superspeedy, superdelish snack, because she is far too busy helping people make their lives awesomer to futz around making foodz.   She swears this is easy to make, and that you, like she, will get a million compliments on it.  Thx, Kathleen (types up comments form to make complimenting easier)!  HOORAY FOR EVERYTHING!

HUMMUS  from Kathleen, by way of the Vegan Family Cookbook

Get this:

1 15-oz can garbanzo beans (rinsed, b/c: yurk)
2 Tbs lemon juice
2 Tbs water
1 Tbs sesame butter (or tahini, or, sure, peanut butter)
1 Tbs olive oil
1 tsp onion powder
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp salt

Do this:

Food process the hell out of it until it is super smooth, then top with paprika.  Recipe doubles great as well.  It seriously takes like 10 min or less to make.

Monday
Jun042012

Home Alone!!!!

It's me and three cats for the week! We're going to party like it's 1999!  Code for: we're going to play Pictionary and drink cheap champagne. So fancy, I know. We're also going to make some strawberry rhubarb jam because I've got so many strawberries this season. And we're going to move piles of books from downstairs to the upstairs. I doubt the cats will be carrying any books but if it gets boring I'm going to invent a book bag for kitties.

The truth is I am a crazy cat lady when left alone. I am less of one when Noah is around. But when he's out of town, it's me and well, cats. They are currently assisting me with this blog post by sitting on the kitchen island purring. All three of them will be curled up in bed with me tonight. And I'll most likely wake up with a cat sleeping on my head. Like you do when you are being totally loved by a furry beast. I've been talking to them since getting home from le shoppe. Like they care how the Cambie dress class went. Or that darling Lizzy sent me the best birthday gift ever. (ART!!!!) Or that Noah's car is making funny sounds but instead of getting it fixed he got a hair cut and then drove nearly three hours to Vermont. (I'm not upset, I swear.)

But if I don't chat them up I'm pretty sure I'd go crazy. Like put on some banana-pants and start wearing mismatched shoes. Because the last eight years of my life I've lived with other people. I don't even remember the last time it was just me and these cats. I have a menu of meals to eat over the next week so I don't just consume Pimm's and coffee. (In 1999 I survived on vodka and cigarettes. I'm not even joking.) Mini-fritattas for lunch, homemade chicken soup with wild rice for dinner. I even pickled some carrots to snack on. I am going to resist all the foods that I've had to give up to keep the hives in check like bread and ice cream. Being dairy and gluten-free is particularly difficult when all you want is to eat toast and cuddle up with a pint of Ben and Jerry's or eat a pizza. Oh my...I want pizza so bad.

PLUS I'm going to send out some snail mail. Save the post and all that jazz. I have some most excellent cards from an artist/friend of mine. And I owe so many faraway people correspondence. This will be my way of feeling a little less lonely. And a little less like a crazy cat lady. So if you'd like a note, send me your address and I promise I'll write you. In my best penmanship. And send stickers. Because that's what well-rounded young ladies do. Right?

Thursday
May312012

Princesses, robots + cupcakes

I have zero pictures of robots! However, plenty of girls ALSO like dinosaurs!Okay, show of hands: how many of us are girls, grew up as a girl, have girls, or know any girls?  Mmhmm, several of us, I see.

Well!  Maybe some of you who raised your hands will spend some mental time (as I have over the last couple of weeks) with young Maya!  Maya is the five-year-old robot-loving princess daughter of blogger Andrea.  Andrea was dismayed when Maya came home from school and announced that she didn’t like cars or robots any more, because other girls made fun of her for it.  I read about Maya, and my heart broke for the poor dear, and the State of the World, and KIDS TODAY.  Then I KEPT reading—nearly 170 comments, last I looked—and nigh upon cried at all the responses from engineers, princesses, scientists, gearheads, girly girls, teachers, doctors, soldiers, lawyers, most of them women, some men-who-know-women, all exhorting Maya to love what she loves, and do what she wants, and APOLOGIZE TO NO ONE!

(Why do we do this?  Why is it so hard, as people, to chill out and not cutPlenty of girls ALSO like flowers! On our heads! Or not! anyone else down to embiggen ourselves?  Is it a cultural thing?  Are we born needing to do this?  Do we learn it from reality TV?  Are kids in Sweden and Taiwan being this same kind of terrible to other Swedish and Taiwanese kids?  If we could somehow all use our brains exclusively for awesomeness, life would be like that one Bradley Cooper movie, only with friendliness and exuberant support instead of car crashes and assassins (I’m pretty sure I fell asleep during Limitless).)

ANYWAY.  Read about Maya!  Read about everyone who responded to Maya!  And then read Andrea’s postscript!  You’ll be disheartened AND heartened!  While you’re doing that, I’m just going to set out these cupcakes.  I really wanted to have Speaking of sciencey girls, my baby sister (right) discovered a gene when she was 20! AND she invented my nephew!snacks in the clubhouse tonight, and the first thing I thought of was the red velvet cupcakes from Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World.  Every, every time we have dinner with our friends Derek & Kathleen, Adrian wheedles a batch of these out of Derek (robots + cupcakes: BOTH for girls AND boys!).  They’re reportedly supereasy, I promise they’re delicious, and while they bake, Derek highly recommends Post Punk Kitchen (mothership of the vegan cupcake book) if you’re vegan, cooking for vegans, or just like food (WHICH WE DO (high fives everyone)).

Now.  Let’s all get back out there and BE MORE AWESOME!  (slaps you all on the butt)

Monday
May282012

Is this feminist?

The answer is almost always "PROBLEMATIC".

 

Perhaps my favorite: This woman is acting in a play. Is this feminist? ...the best way to avoid sexism is not have female roles at all. Because no strong and flawless female characters have ever been written.

Giving two thumbs up? Nope, that's just telling someone that a good job is equivalent to growing a penis.

Doing science? Nah, that's adopting and reinforcing a masculine-supremacist view of intelligence.

You'll find that little is feminist. Because being a marginally acceptable feminist is a full time job. There's more to be discovered over at Is This Feminist? so you can stop worrying if everything the media is throwing at you is part of the grand scheme to keep you disenfranchised and suppressed. And be sure to watch what you eat, how you shake hands and seriously, who you text!

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